There's a lot of stuff I really like over here, but there's a lot of stuff I really like over there. It's hard to articulate, but the Coles Notes is that Canadians are very polite in public, but in more direct social situations, they are a bunch of whiny cunts who over-value their own flaws and expect a fuck of a lot more out of the world than they deserve.
I found the Germans to be complete pricks in most public situations, but a lot more realistic and pragmatic in one on one situations. German women rock my world, most Europeans I met in my travels are much more socially conscious and generally, grounded in reality and show an interest in more than just themselves while people over here seem to live in this ivory tower and suffer from the delusion that the filth that comes out of their arse should be worth something.
Life here is comfortable, but terribly dull and uninspiring. Comfort is great when you are old and looking for a bed to die in. Seeing as how I'm still above ground, however, I'd like to live while I'm alive. Here, that seems to mean eating garbage food, drinking piss beer and complaining about how the world doesn't change your diaper fast or well enough for your liking.
In brief, I am fucking miserable here and I owe it to myself to go somewhere where I can live a life that means something to me. When and if I land over there, we'll have to get together during the Oktoberfest and you can drink me into a coma. (A trick my Munich friends taught me to make easy money is to lease your flat out during Oktoberfest since the entire city is booked solid and fuck off for a while. They say you can easily make 3 - 4 months rent in 6 weeks while you couch surf around the continent.)
Besides, since German men are such assholes and the German girls tell me I am kind and romantic with my cute little Canadian accent, I think I owe it to myself to rope down one of the finest young German ladies I can find and use teh ole Canuck cock to try to fuck my way into landed immigrant status.
It might not work, but hey, it's worth a try. Beats pulling my hair out dealing with all the fuckin twats that populate this country. We might be better than Americans, but that's not saying much. Not saying much at all, and sadly enough, the gap between us is narrowing more and more every year much to my dismay. But I'll shut up before these cunts get their dicks in a knot and come after me with hockey sticks and force me to drink the piss that they call beer and listen to Nickelback.